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Comic relief anyone?

September 8, 2014

There are probably more important stories out there than the U.S. Forest Service jumping on the healthy eating band wagon to celebrate National Roasted Marshmallow Day. ( I mean, who isn’t just drooling over a marshmallow and blueberry s’more?)

Stories like a 9th century band of barbarians threatening the entire civilized world for instance.

But somehow, the blog post suggesting that we all substitute fruit for chocolate on our s’mores provides a much-needed break from all that reality.

It was tongue-in-cheek right?  Well, probably not, since it follows the line that we are all too fat because we eat too much junk food.

It goes right along with taxing soda or Boston researchers advocating adding a 30% tax on pre-packaged food.

How come you never hear about adding a 30% obesity tax on computers, I-anythings, TV’s or power tools?

Or how about a 30% fat tax on cars, ATV’s and jet-skis?

I think it’s time for those of us tired of all of this politically correct idiocy to fight back in a way that these folks understand. Tax their keyboards, their phones, their apps, their jets, their soon-to-be-delivered robot cars, and their other toys because if you ain’t movin’, you ain’t burning calories, and that has a  lot more to do with obesity than what we eat.

Let’s go really green and warm our mud-and-wattle huts with wood we chop by hand, or dried cow patties that we harvest from those awful feedlots. Become one with the rest of the third world countries, so to speak.

We could even outlaw all motor vehicle ownership for anyone living less than ten miles from shopping centers, malls and bars. We could tax planes, trains, elevators, escalators, and just about every other modern convenience.

Wow!  Look at all the things we could tax and ban! This is fun!  No wonder these folks get so much enjoyment out of telling the rest of us what to do, what to think and what to eat.

Or,  we could just wait until they achieve world equality, utopia and world peace.  If we do that, we can enjoy chocolate on our s’mores for a long, long time.

From → op-ed

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