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Ladies, are you for real?

January 21, 2017

Honestly, there are times when I am ashamed to be of the female gender.

This contrived and pointless new feminist movement, as it applies to the United States, and the attendant Women’s March Movement is one of those times.

Note that I am only chastising my U.S. gender-mates. In other parts of the world, women don’t even have basic human rights, and their circumstances and aspirations are far different than they are in the U.S. of A.

I don’t presume to have an in-depth understanding of their needs, other than that I fully support them not being mutilated, beaten, kept as sex slaves, and yes, killed in the name of “honor”  and in their right to seek an education.

Those are basic human rights and as a member of the human race I support them without reservation.

So for all of you feminist militants, let’s keep the conversation on point as it applies to the women marching on Washington.

Here, in this country, I think I have a pretty good handle on the “plight of women.”

And I have to ask…

Since when does having a uterus and mammary glands make you so freakin’ special?

Yes, I know that there is a double standard for men in some things.  A man that fools around is “just being a guy” while a woman is a slut.

I get all that, but I don’t think we are ever going to change basic biology.

If a guy offends you, it’s up to you to tell him so, instead of running off to find the nearest reporter.

And while we are on the subject, I don’t appreciate my gender being made to look like a bunch of crybabies.

So, taking my own advice,  here’s my take on your “movement.”

It pisses me off when a feminist stands on her soapbox and screams about gender equality and then asks for special  treatment because she chooses to compete in fields in which she already knows she can’t perform equally with men.

Take it from somebody whose avocation put her in  (successful) competition with men on every level, sometimes you really can’t do the job as well as a man.

In that case you have either accept that as fact, or use your brain to level the playing field.

One glaring example of accepting facts is the issue of women in the military.

Now let’s get something straight.  Women bleed the same color as men when they get shot or blown up. Any military person of either sex is my hero.

But damn it, if you can’t pack the same load as far as a man of your same size and training then that is not anyone’s fault but yours.

Pick another career, or train harder. That’s not sexist. It’s physiology.

Then there is the issue of wages.

There are already laws on the books that forbid employers from paying you less than a man if you do the same job and do it as well or better than your male counterparts.

You don’t need to march on Washington or Phoenix or San Francisco to achieve income parity.

You need to march into your HR department, with full documentation that proves your case and demand a hearing.

If that doesn’t work, every state in the union has a Department of Labor, and you can take your case there.

It works.  I know.  I did it. In 1973.

But notice I said you need to be able to prove your case. For instance, in my case the knock on me was that I didn’t close as many sales orders as my male counterparts, and that was true.

But the company compensation standard was based on revenue produced, not quantity of closed sales, and on that score, I beat out my male co-workers hands down.

My case didn’t get past the local employment office level.  The hearing officer took one look at my proof of claim and called the employer in to explain himself.

The man couldn’t explain why he would pay the top producer in the department less than the lower producing males. His answer was  (and he really said this) that the men had families to support, and I was single at the time.

Needless to say, the make-up check was a doozy.

Did it make me unpopular? It sure did with management, but surprisingly, there wasn’t a man on the sales floor that didn’t side with me.

I moved on in life to a different career than sales, but I like to think that I left a positive mark on that company.

And that’s how you do it. One woman at a time, one battle fought. You’ll win some and yes, you’ll lose some.

It doesn’t take a headline grabbing march to do that. It takes guts and individual initiative.

Then there is the case of accommodating women with families in the workplace.

Some of your complaints are valid, some are not.  If you have used up your maternity leave (which is in itself an accommodation) and you are nursing, they do make breast pumps and bottles that you can leave for the babysitter or your husband.

If that doesn’t work in your particular situation, just remember…you chose ( or I hope you did) to have a family. That’s not your employer’s fault. There are enough safeguards in place in the 21st century that you should be able to make it work.

On the related subject of family planning, that needs to be a conversation with your partner, your doctor and your belief system.

This is the one area where I agree with the point of view that it is your body, not the State’s.

While I don’t personally agree with abortion as a form of birth control, there are other instances in which it may be justified, particularly if the mother’s health or life is at risk.

For that reason, I would prefer to see the abortion option kept but much more tightly regulated, but that’s just me.

Abortion isn’t, or shouldn’t be a matter for any government to affirm or deny. At its most basic level, it is just another surgical procedure.

I know that this point of view will rile up the pro-life segment, but again, your belief system is your own. It should not be something you impose on others, any more than it is the right of ISIS to kill you because you are a Christian or a Jew or a follower of a different interpretation of Islam.

Having said that, there are two sides to that coin, and that fetus is a human life in the making, a distinction that is often lost on the pro-choice side.

We aren’t talking about puppy mills here.

In most cases, you have a choice as to whether to get pregnant.  One unwanted pregnancy might be an accident (there have been thousands of children born to women using birth control), or the result of a criminal act.  Any more often than that and we get into the realm of personal responsibility. Repeated unwanted pregnancies are 90% the result of a pattern of  reproductive irresponsibility, so long as any woman can qualify for and obtain free birth control pills.

In those instances where your man is forcing you to have unprotected sex, you have recourse to any number of laws that even cover marital rape. You need to use them.

Where your cultural or religious heritage enters into the picture, you might need outside help. It’s available, if you want it badly enough.

Often lost in the partisan bickering is the fact that adoption is always a viable option. The choice does not have to be keeping the baby or killing it. There are thousands, maybe even tens of thousands, of barren couples out there that would love to give your unwanted child a loving home.

If we need more laws to combat irresponsible reproduction then yes, I believe in demanding that the woman take personal responsibility for her actions, and by that I mean a sentence of community service and a fine, not jail time, and the partner must be identified.

You may not agree with my take on the feminist movement, but I’m a dozen years younger than Gloria Steinem. I lived through the same “Father Knows Best™” era she did, but I didn’t stay stuck in the 1950’s.

Women in the U.S. have more freedom of lifestyle choice now than at any time in the history of man.

We can go to the Moon and beyond it to Mars if we train hard enough and want it bad enough.

We can become billionaire entertainment moguls, or run for President.

And yes, we can happily choose to stay home and be wives and mothers.

Stop bitching, and start living your life, not the one that some group tells you to aspire to for their own selfish motives.

We have enough laws.  Maybe what we need now is to find our individual backbones.

You can’t demonstrate for equality, and then expect to be treated as the “weaker sex.”

That just makes all women look ridiculous, and I don’t appreciate that label at all.

From → op-ed

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